Meo Abuse me/ Fuck Me-Restraints

Vendor: Meo

The Abuse Me Restraints fully Assambled without Locks

The Abuse Me Restraints fully Assambled without Locks

I was for some time looking for a restraint layout; I actually was developing one of my own until I discovered this nifty one at Meo’s website. So I was very happy when they send me the toys as a review sample for the heavy bondage special.

Construction

This restraint consists out of four pieces. The basis is a 5cm x 21cm large piece of stiff leather. In the middle is a pin with a drilled hole to house a pad lock. Onto this pin a 28cm long leather strap is attached. The strap has eleven holes with a spacing of 1.5cm for adjusting the space between the balls and the restraints. Onto the far end of the strap another 22cm long strap of soft triple layered leather is attached for being put around the balls or the entire junk. On the one side of this strap is another pin, on the other side six holes for adjusting the size. Left and right of the pin of the basic piece of leather are the rows of three holes each. Through these holes you put the provided wrist restraints. Their outside is made out of stiff leather, the inside is lined with soft a one. They feature a welded D-ring and two pins with drilled holes at the top. In order to adjust the size there are six sets of holes allowing for a diameter between and 4.5cm and 7.5cm.

The toy comes with six keyed alike locks.

Detail of the two Wrist Restraints

Detail of the two Wrist Restraints

Playing with it

Putting this restraint configuration on takes a bit of work: First you put on the wrist restraints and attach them to the rectangular body. Once you have done that you can already use this toy as all leather rigid cuffs. The next step is to put the leather strap either around the balls or your entire junk depending on the intended effect. Putting it just around the balls will increase the pain sensation. The same counts for the last step: Attaching the genitalia to the main body. The shorter the distance between them, the more intense the sensation.

The Toy used as Rigid Cuffs

The Toy used as Rigid Cuffs

As you can tell from the way it is put on the unique purpose of this toy is creating a physical feedback loop between the hands and the balls. This leads to interesting bondage scenarios. The first one is probably stress bondage. Put the sub in an uncomfortable position and watch him wiggle. Each evasive movement with his arms will tug on his balls. This is especially effective when the balls are already bruised. If you are really sadistic you can do what a friend of mine did and put a leather strap with (dull) pins on the inside of the strap around the balls. Of cause this feedback loop works also the other way round. Once the sub has found a somewhat comfortable position, smack his balls to encourage some movement. But also in a normal play situation this method of fettering someone is very interesting. The human body usually try to “work out” pain sensation through muscle movement. So regardless of what you are doing to the sub as soon as he tries to move his arms to help processing the sensation his balls will feel the effect. I found that particularly fun in combination with CBT or e-stim around the balls. The more the sub tries to work out the sensation, the more his balls hurt. What I haven’t tried but probably is forbidden amount of fun is attaching an electrode to the balls and clipping the E-Stim Systems Remote with its movement sensor onto it.

Despite Meo’s product name calling them Abuse Me/ Fuck me restraints this restraint layout is NOT made for fucking, at least when it comes to anal intercourse. The strap connecting the balls with the wrist restraints runs directly through or above (depending on the tension) the ass crack so the sphincter is covered.

Conslusion: Unique and effective combination of CBT and bondage.
Pro Cons Where to get Price
Interesting sensation feedback loop Takes some time to put on Meo 89€
Inspires creative bondage Leather takes some time to soften
Can be used as all leather rigid cuffs

Uberkinky Mister B Triple Cockstrap with Dull Pins

Vendor: Uberkinky

This is the second toy Uberkinky kindly send me to still your thirst for info about small and handy CBT devices.

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The Mister B Triple Cockstrap with Dull Pins from Uberkinky

Construction

This toy has a two piece construction. On the one end there is a leather cockring which has five approx. 6mm long dull stainless steel pins at the bottom. At the top there are three snap buttons so it fits even the biggest junks. This cockring is connected to a 9cm long cock sheath. On the inside are three lines with five dull pins each. The sheath is closed by three Velcro straps with which you can adjust how tightly you want to wrap it around the dick. The entire toy is made out of and lined with soft leather.

Detail of the Sheath's Pins and Velcro Closing Straps

Detail of the Sheath’s Pins and Velcro Closing Straps

Playing with it

Using the Mister B Triple Cockstrap with Dull Pins is quite easy: First put the cockring on, than wrap the sheath around the dick and fetter it with the three Velcro straps. The interesting part of this process is how tight you close both parts and if the dick is hard or not. Depending on the tightness the pins the sheath are teasing over annoying to agonizing.

The most fun I had with the Mister B Triple Cockstrap with Dull Pins was putting it around a soft dick just so tight that the pins made skin contact. Since my sub had a blood penis it just took some teasing to make his dick hard and thus the pins started to press into his dick. The sensation because uncomfortable, his dick got soft again and the sensation seized – so his dick grew again from the stimulation. I played this game for over an hour and it was great to see him struggle with the frustration of being chased between arousal and discomfort.

Detail of the Cockstrap with Dull Pins

Detail of the Cockstrap with Dull Pins

For real hard CBT placed it on a hard dick and start jerking the sub of. The irritation of the dull pins will drive him mad yet most likely will not break his skin. If you want to increase the inflicted sensations connect the pins with silver covered copper wire which you can connect to an e-stim unit. The low mass and small contact area will produce a quite stingy sensation.

The most surprising usage scenario was putting the Mister B Triple Cockstrap with Dull Pins onto a sub as a reminder of belonging to a top but who couldn’t wear a chastity belt. Due to the dull pins it has more presence than just a cockring but it is more comfortable and easier to wear than a chastity cage. Of cause being made out of leather it can’t be worn forever but well enough for a work day.

Conclusion: Subtle yet intense and well controllable handy CBT toy
Pro Cons Where to get Price
Wide range of sensations Uberkinky £39.99
Subtle sensation that develops over time
Will fit all dick sizes

Trend Topics: CBT and Crackstuffer

Each week I get dozens of reader questions. Usually they are quite diverse ranging from dating tips over advice on how to produce a certain sensation with a toy to recommendations which toy to buy. But sometimes there seems to be a pattern. For example in December and early January I have gotten asked a lot if I knew any small, light and travel friendly CBT toys. And in the last two weeks I have gotten over 25 messages asking my opinion on Crackstuffers toys and their new material.
As a marketer I wonder how these concentrations occur because for as far as I can tell they come from all over the world. As a toy tester I try to answer them as good as possible. Because I already intended to feature some cock bondage devices in the upcoming heavy bondage special, I decided to start out with these toys and reached out to Uberkinky to get some additional handy CBT toys. Sadly I don’t own any Crackstuffers toys and currently other toys are higher on my priority list. So it will probably take some time or some review samples until I can give an educated opinion on their toys.
Until than enjoy some insight into the painful world of CBT and restricting world of heavy bondage.

Bondage Hardware Special Part 6 –Emergency Kit

Easy to spot and handy enough to take to dungeon parties.

Easy to spot and handy enough to take to dungeon parties.

This article is the last part of the Bondage Hardware Special. In this text I will show you what I keep in the emergency kit that I usually take with me when I go out for play. It gives me a bit of confidence knowing that if something goes wrong I can properly deal with it. This confidence of cause requires some discipline so before each time I take this bag with me I check if everything is there in a decent amount and still good. If not, I replace it. Some items might sound strange to you or trivial because they are standard equipment of every play location. However if you ever had to wipe away blood in a play space where paper towels were scarce you don’t laugh about a tissue pack in an emergency kit.

The kit I have put together might not be perfect but it has proven itself in emergencies. If you feel I have forgotten something important please send me an e-mail.

Gloves

Gloves are the basis for every wound care. It prevents the wound from being infected with bacteria from your hand (if you put them on in a correct way) and protects you from possible infections. I have to admit that I don’t carry sterile one in my kit but use hand sanitizer on them before touching the injured person.

Band-aid & Adhesive Tape

Don’t really know what to write about band-aids. Should a no brainer and should be kept in a separate plastic bag to prevent it from possible contamination.

Gauze Bandage & Compresses

If a band-aid is not enough these are the right tools to staunch a wound. To some this might sound a bit overkill and I have to admit that I luckily never had to use mine. Yet I have seen suspension setups failing, tall people walking against arches and getting lacerations on their forehead. Again: Better be safe than sorry.

First Aid Blanket

Another better safe than sorry item. I can hardly think of a play induced injury that would require a first aid blanket but they are useful after a circulatory collapse or hypoglycemia.

Tissue

Tissues are quite versatile objects: You can use them as an impro compress, turn them into alcohol wipes or simple wipe away blood.

Disinfection

There are three different kinds of disinfection products in my bag. The most important one is my 90% alcohol solution. Some disinfection sprays have additives which make them a bit more effective but can cause skin irritations. Because of that I use alcohol to sanitize abrased skin like a flogged back or my toys after using them. If the wound is deeper or larger I use a wound spray which also disinfects and helps the wound heal. Yet the one I use stings even more than alcohol so I use it only in emergencies. The last disinfection product is sanitizing hand gel which can be incorporated into play p.e. messaging it into the skin area.

Ointment

There are a number of different ointments out there for different purposes, like panthenol for abrased skin or zinc oxide for treating burns. Because space in my bag is limited I chose a diaper rash ointment which is sold in travel size. With panthenol, zinc oxide, chamomile and marigold extract it is not as potent as a pure wound ointments yet I like it for its versatility. It is good enough for a first treatment, potent enough to (almost) restore worn nipple over night for another scene and soothes abused sphincter after a heavy fisting.

Horse Ointment

This product raises the most eye brows. Originally designed to help horses recover after races this gel has a lot of soothing, cooling and anti-bruise ingredients. Especially when you have damaged joints this ointment works wonder after stress bondage or kneeling! The smell is a bit hate it or love it but it magically restores mobility over night.

Emergency Hardware

Emergency Hardware

EMT Scissors, Emergency Knife, Belt Cutter & Multi Tool

Please read last week’s article why I consider these tools essential. I usually have at least a pair of EMT scissors in my play bag but in an emergency I don’t want to search but just quickly grab thus I keep an additional one in my bright red bag.

Flash light

Another eye brow raiser in my kit. I once attended a play party when there was a power failure and the dungeon went dark and through the following turmoil my sub started to panic. Undoing a sub in total darkness is no fun so I now carry a flash light with me. It comes in also handy when you look for keys, nipple clamps or other small stuff you tend to loose in a dark space.

Consolatury Candy for After Scene Care.

Consolatury Candy for After Scene Care.

Chocolate, Consolatory Cookies & Dextrose

While both candies are useful when you are playing with a person suffering from diabetes these are more aftercare items. A BDSM scene puts the body in a state of alertness and thus mobilizes emergency resources which is quite exhausting for the sub. While the endorphin level is high and this state continues you don’t feel how spent you are. In order to prevent a crash I give and take dextrose after a scene. The chocolate has the same effect but also has a bit of rewarding component. Maybe the top pushed you onto your edge and beyond and I have some of the fondest memories cuddling with my top after an intense scene happily munching my chocolate and cookies.

Cough & Iceland Moos

When you have incorporated gases into your breath play like poppers in the aftermath you lungs and airways could be irritated, phlegm and you can experience problems breathing. Strong cough drops help clear the airways and Iceland moos helps regenerate the irritated areas.

Condoms & Lube

Again as with the EMT scissors: The emergency kit is the place where I know that I definitely have a stash in case of a horniness emergency.

 

This was the last part of the Bondage Hardware Special. I hope you enjoyed it. If you have any suggestions or comments, please let me know.

Sticking to the theme there will be a special on Heavy Bondage toys soon.

Bondage Hardware Special Part 5 –Safety Hardware

The last four weeks were about different means to fetter a sub whether with rope or how to most effectively use all the great other bondage gear that is out there. But what if something goes wrong and you can’t release the sub out of the bondage setup? This article is about different tools that in a case of emergency will help release a sub in a secure way. Usually this goes to the cost of the bondage gear but better replace a rope or restraint than having to go to the emergency room! If you are hesitant about your precious and expensive ropes, buy them from Twisted Monk. He will give you a discount when you replace cut ropes because like me he values the sub’s security over the preservation of gear.

Mr S Safety Scissors

Mr S Safety Scissors

Scissors

Scissors are the most essential safety tools of a playroom if you don’t use chain or metal wire for bondage. If you buy the right ones they will cut the sub out of restraints with jammed locks, release mummified bondage bottoms and slice band aids in the right length. To my own surprise I still see high quality kitchen scissors in playroom with the argument that they cut really well. While having a kitchen scissor is better than having none I would not recommend using them. Due to their pointy end they can cause injuries. Instead buy emergency scissors. You can get them in any good fetish stores (like Mr S or Regulation) and most of the time they are surprisingly cheaper there than in pharmacies and drug stores. These emergency scissors are good for the most common playroom emergencies like cutting rope, leather or Segufix restraints. If you are into heavier bondage like fiberglass casting or you high resistance gear incorporating Kevlar I would recommend investing more money. There are safety scissors out there used in ambulances to cut bikers out of Kevlar reinforced bike gear. The costs 200€+ but are well worth the money if you play that heavy.

Bolt Cutters

If you fancy steel over leather and rope this are your safety scissors. Bolt cutters will open jammed locks, cut steel wires or bend open chain elements or D-rings if necessary. Bolt cutters are usually certified for maximum thickness of steel they can handle. I would recommend you to buy a model that can handle 20% more than your thickest chain just to have a safety margin. There are people out there who use die grinders or oscillating tools for cutting metal. While they are quicker and require no brute force to cut through metal I would not recommend them. In order not to harm the sub he needs to lay still and the person using the tools needs a calm hand, both conditions that are usually not met in a case of emergency.

Finally a word about the materials a bolt cutter can cut: Usually they are designed to cut steel. Because aluminum is a rather tough metal most bolt cutters can’t cut it so you need different means to cut open most climbing carabiners.

Emergency Knife for Rope Cutting with a Belt Cutter

Emergency Knife for Rope Cutting with a Belt Cutter

Emergency Knife

This kind of knife is designed to cut through tough material in cases of emergency. They come in different varieties. Mine is designed to be place under a rope and sever through it without any danger for the person lying under the rope. There are also versions out there with a point end that can cut through tougher material like Kevlar but naturally with this design can potentially injure the sub. All blades have a mechanical locking mechanism so even when applying great force the blade won’t close. A nifty thing is that most emergency knifes have a belt cutter on one end.

Belt Cutter

For most of my bondage setups I use tension belts made out of nylon. This special cutter cuts through them like butter if they are taut. Some of them even cut through thin strings. Because unlike scissors you don’t have to open and close the belt cutter in some situations they are a quicker way to cut someone free.

Leatherman Multi Tool

Leatherman Multi Tool

Multi Tool

This article is called security hardware so this is the right place to talk about multi tools. While the tools describe above are designed to release subs out of a predicament this is more of a precaution tool. Sometimes you see a loose screw, a rough edge or other imperfections in your playroom you usually would not necessarily fix right away because you would need to get your tools. Sadly these little things can cause big problems. Because of that I keep a multi tool in the playroom for all the little things that need to be fixed right away. Besides that multi tools come with scissors, a knife, needle-nosed pliers and reamers. While they might not be strong enough or designed for injury protection when used close to humans they are better than nothing when you need a tool fast. Some multi tools even come with a set of hexes which is useful when you dislocated the hex to open the ball stretcher.

While there are a lot of inexpensive multi tools sold, I strongly recommend investing the money into a quality brand product. Most other multi tools are so flimsy that pose a threat in their own.

 

While the tools presented in this article help to prevent greater injuries sometimes it might be too late. So in the next and thus last part of the Bondage Hardware Special I will take you on a tour through my emergency bag and thus through all the things I consider essential to keep at hand when playing hard.

Bondage Hardware Special Part 4 – Accessories

Welcome to the fourth part of the Bondage Hardware Special. This article will be about all the things you might not necessarily think off when you plan a bondage scene. Yet there are many scenarios where these things are nifty or even essential.ToyTorture.com has always been a website offering advice and information for people just starting out in the scene. So for the experienced player many things might be standard dungeon equipment and thus are trivial bunt since I wanted to give an overview about all things I consider important please bear with me. You might find something you have not though off yet.

Juggling Balls, Bells, etc.

Especially when bondage aficionados think about scenes the scenario can’t be too strict and inescapable. As tempting as this scenario is especially when it comes to gags it has a safety risk because the sub can’t articulate a safe word anymore. One way to get around this is giving him something to hold onto that he can drop if he needs to articulate a concern. This can be a juggling ball or a bell if the top wants also an acoustic alert.

I know that this is kind of a crutch because in some scenarios like sleepsacks or straightjackets an object can’t be hold and focusing on holding onto something might keep a sub from really going under into the headspace. But especially when playing with new kinksters just starting to venture deeper into heavier bondage I find an additional safety line a good way to establish trust and confidence.

A Sippy Cup from IKEA

A Sippy Cup from IKEA

Sippy Cups

Especially when it comes to stress or heavy gear bondage people subs tend to sweat a lot so it is important to stay hydrated. Being in a bondage predicament however limits the possibility to drink properly. The sub either spills the liquid or the water flows into his mouth too quickly making him choke. I found sippy cups like the ones used in retirement homes or nurseries a good and secure way to provide the sub with water. I have experimented with drinking straws but was not too impressed.

Human Waste Disposal

Everything that goes into the body has to leave it at some point of time. Especially when it comes to long term bondage this might pose a problem because when nature’s urges call you are not able to get out of the bondage in time or you don’t want to.

  1. Urine Bottles
    A Non-autoclave Urine Bottle

    A Non-autoclave Urine Bottle

    Developed for people who can’t go to the bath room these bottles are designed to allow easy pissing into them. However in some bondage configurations or with some smaller dicks it can be a challenge to piss into them.

  2. Diapers
    In this case I would recommend diapers. They are also handy when you pack the sub so well that his dick can’t be accessed or if the bondage scene lasts so long that feces might be become an issue. There are different kinds of diapers out the. Traditional diapers made for adults can take considerable amounts of feces and piss without leaking. However they need to expand in order to work properly so take this into consideration when fettering around the crotch. If you just expect not too much urine there are thin diapers out there for people with bladder problems that can’t handle too much liquid. While adult diapers are usually sold at pharmacies you can get the latter kind of diapers in most drug stores.

Cover

Another body fluid that can cause problems is sweat. Again a problem with long term or gear bondage (particularly rubber gear) sweat can leak out of the gear which is especially annoying when you are playing on the bed you want to sleep in later.

  1. Pool Liner
    Available in most kinkster’s favorite color black and widely available at hardware stores this tarp is water proof. However it just keeps the water from sinking into anything so be careful when getting up or moving the tarp in order to get rid of the liquid.
  2. Towels
    I though this would be a no-brainer but many people are actually surprised when they see a stack of towels on my play cart. So this is a reminder that it is wise to have towels accessible in your playroom. For bondage place a once or twice folded one under areas where leakage is possible (p.e. when rubber gear ends or under non-waterproof zips of sleepsacks), use them to soak up spilled liquids or just keep them ready to rub the sweat of the sub when he has gotten out of the gear.
  3. Back Print of a Changing Table Cover

    Back Print of a Changing Table Cover

    Changing Table Covers
    When you are like me living in a dorm room the two options above are kind of difficult to live with. Tarps need to be laid out in order to dry which is a challenge in small spaces. Towels also need to be washed and dried which in some dorms (like the one I stayed during my exchange year in the USA) is not as easy as it might sound. My suggested solution for this are changing table covers. They are designed to soak up liquids and be disposed afterwards. Besides bondage I used them for fisting scenes in my bed. Just place one under the ass and you don’t have to worry about lube dripping out of the bottom’s ass. Changing table covers are quite inexpensive yet they are not too large and most of the time come with prints appealing to babies. There are also bed covers for incontinent adults which are larger yet unproportinal more expensive.

This article was about nifty but not necessarily crucial objects. Next week will be about security hardware which I consider a must!

Bondage Hardware Special Part 3 – Connection Hardware

In the first two parts of this Bondage Hardware Special I presented to you means how to attach subs to themselves, each other or furniture. This article is about all the hardware you can use to connect different means. This hardware is especially useful when using Rope Substitutes I talked about last week because unlike rope in most cases you can’t simply tie a knot to connect two or more straps.

Two Versions of Uncertified Aluminum Carabiners

Two Versions of Uncertified Aluminum Carabiners

Before I talk about the different kinds of connection hardware I first need to talk about an important term when it comes to bondage equipment: The breaking load. It measures the amount of force an object can withstand without giving in. The certified breaking load has often two measurements: The static breaking load measures the amount of weight that can hang from an object without giving in, the dynamic breaking load gives the amount of moving (p.e. swinging) weight a piece of hardware can deal with without failing. In most cases the breaking load differs between an open and a closed gate and in which direction the force is applied. The breaking load is measured in Newton (N). One Newton is approx 100g on the earth’s surface. This is why most of the time the breaking load is measure in Kilo Newton (kN) which equates approx. 100kg.

The breaking load is important for liability reasons. If you use uncertified equipment and something happens it is possible that your insurance will not cover for you. Most of the time a breaking load is certified for a specific piece of connection hardware but it states explicitly on the packaging that it is not made for supporting humans. This is a legal grey zone: Yes, theoretically insurance companies can deny your claim if something happens because the hardware was not certified for human usage but I have never heard of such a case.

Carabiners

Carabiners are probably the most often used piece of connection hardware. They are a wire bend into roughly oval or triangular shape with a gate to open it. Usually a spring keeps the gate closed if you don’t apply pressure. They are made out of stainless steel, steel, aluminum, titanium, carbon fiber, composite and plastic.

Carabiners come in many different forms which sadly are not all made for human bondage.

  1. Clips
    An opend Pear Clip where you can see the Sharp Edges of the Gate

    An opend Pear Clip where you can see the Sharp Edges of the Gate

    In Germany this type of carabiner is also called “Hardware Store Carabiner” because you can get them in a hardware store quite cheaply. Despite being used in many playrooms I would not recommend them for BDSM. First of all there is the breaking load. In order to get a static breaking load larger than quarter of a ton which in my opinion is the minimum for fettering humans you have to buy pear clips with the size 90x9mm and up which have been manufactured under DIN 5299. Second their general design is in my opinion bad for gear play. The end of the gate is an arrow-shaped hook that locks into place between two noses. These elements are quite sharp. In a good case they just scratch your gear buy I have seen rubber gear tear from the sharp edges. Despite the disadvantages I will not condemn them. I am not a big fan of them yet due to economically reasons I use them p.e. for attaching chains to attachment points when I am sure that I won’t exceed the breaking load. When using them just keep the potential problems in mind.
    Besides the steel clips there are non-certified aluminum ones which are great for attaching things like weights to parachutes.

  2. Climbing carabiners
    Three Different Versions of Climbing Carabiners with the Bracking Load Printed on them

    Three Different Versions of Climbing Carabiners with the Bracking Load Printed on them

    You don’t have to worry about these problems when you buy climbing carabiners. They are made out of aluminum and thus are light weight. Being made to support human beings even when falling down their dynamic breaking load exceeds 4kN in most cases and thus is more than you will ever need. Because they are designed not to damage rope they have no rough edges so no need to worry about your gear. You can get climbing carabiners in many different designs which fit different needs. They are pricy though but definitely gear you will keep for the rest of your life. A bonus is that unlike the steel clips you can get them in many different colors to fit your personal style.

  3. Panic Snaps
    This kind of carabiners will open even when there is force pulling onto them.

    Left: Saddle Panic Snaps Right: A Sailing Panic Hook

    Left: Saddle Panic Snaps
    Right: A Sailing Panic Hook

    They are used for any situation where you would to have to life the sub in order to the d-ring out of the carabiner p.e. the wrist restraints used for above the head fixation on a St.-Andrews-Cross or any form of suspension bondage.
    Panic snaps come in two varieties: The ones for sailing and the ones for animals. The sailing ones have an eyelet at the bottom and on top a gate that is hold shut with a pin. If you want to release the gate pull out the pin. The ones for animals come in again on two varieties: One for dog leashes and one for holding saddles. The two varieties are hard to distinguish but are naturally quite different in breaking load! So I recommend the sailing panic snaps because they are made out of stainless steel (no problem at piss parties), they are lighter and smaller. If you take the smallest sailing panic snap you will probably need an additional shackle you put through the eyelet in order to make it larger.

  4. Stainless Steel Double Ended Carabiner

    Stainless Steel Double Ended Carabiner

    Double Ended Clips
    As the name of the carabiner already says it has a clip on each side connected by a metal bar. They have a very low breaking load. However I like them a lot especially for beginners. If you get well-made stainless steel ones they have no rough edges so your gear is not in danger. Further more in most situations the subs can open them by himself thus freeing him.

Left: Shackle with Breaking Load of 4.600kn Right: Shackle with a Breaking Load of 0.25 kN

Left: Shackle with Breaking Load of 4.600kn
Right: Shackle with a Breaking Load of 0.25 kN

Shackles

Another piece of nautical hardware very well fitted for bondage. Shackles are made out of stainless steel wires which are bend either in ¾ of a circle or two parallel straights with a half circle at the end. On the other end there is a pin which is screwed into a threat closing the shackle. Theoretically a shackle can do the same things as a carabiner but through having to twist in order to close it I find it more practical when I want to connect two things more permanently or when an eyelet is too small.

Screw Links

An even more permanent connection are screw links. They are made out of metal wires and come in oval or triangular shapes. On one side is a sheath with a thread on one end. If you unscrew the sheath it will open a recess. Originally designed to connect two ends of a chain it can also be used to create additionally attachment points, extend a chain or enlarge a too small eyelet.

Pad Locks

While theoretically they are able to connect a D-ring to a chain p.e. I would not recommend using pad locks are connection hardware. In most cases the lock will turn that the force pulls on the body and the shackle. Pad locks with not designed to have physical stress in this position so it is likely that the mechanic inside will jam and you will need a bolt cutter to open the lock!

If you buy locks in order to close lockable bondage gear make sure to buy keyed alike locks! Nothing is more stressful when you need to urgently open a lock and can’t find the key. You can get keyed alike locks at every hardware or lock store. When I suggested getting keyed alike locks to some reader questions people were concerned if that would disclose them as perverts. I can assure you this won’t be the case. Asking for keyed alike locks is quite common for example for equipment lockers in gyms.

A Paw Rigging Plate

A Paw Rigging Plate

Rigging Plates & Stainless Steel Rings

Rigging plates is another piece of professional climbing equipment used to organize and attach different ropes together. They are plates made out of aluminum and sometimes out of stainless steel with holes for ropes. The most common form is the paw with a big hole and three to six smaller ones on top. But tor really elaborate designes you can get rigging plates with more than 20 holes. I use them for organizing my carabiners for suspension bondage so I just need to pull up the plate. A more profane usage scenario is attaching carabiners for a hogtie.

There are large stainless steel rings sometimes with a cross or a triscele in the middle out there called rope rings which fulfill the same purpose though with less organization. If you just want to create a hogtie or don’t want to suspend someone from the ring a stainless steel cockring also does the trick.

Zip Ties

An easy and disposable item for connecting bondage equipment are zip ties. They are plastic bands with a lock on one end and texture on the other end. Pull the textured end through the lock and the connection can’t be opened again. If you get professional ones you can get a breaking load up to 80kg per zip tie. So it only takes three or four to create a strong connection, but please bear in mind that the combined strength is lower than the individual strength added up.

There are versions out there that can be opened up and reused. They are not strong enough for bondage purposes. The same applies to Velcro cable ties!

A Hoist for one or two Ropes

A Hoist for one or two Ropes

Hoists

Not really connection hardware but since I don’t know where to put it else and I store mine along with my carabiners I will shortly talk about hoists here. Hoists are barrels mounted into a case with an eyelet on top. They are certified for being able to bear different amounts of maximum weight. Hoists are useful for suspension bondage: You can create the bondage while the sub lies securely on the floor and later pull him up. There are different types of hoists with up to six barrels. I made the experience than more than three barrels are not practical because the rope will tangle.

So much about gear and hardware to tie people up. Next week will be all about accessories that can be useful to make a bondage scene successful and as little messy as possible.

Bondage Hardware Special Part 2 – Rope Substitutes

This is the second part of the Bondage Hardware Special. While in the first part I talked about Rope in this text will be about all the different means you can use to fetter someone if you don’t want to deal with rope.

Tension Belts

Originally these belts were designed to secure cargo but are as equally good for securing human beings. They consist of a nylon strap which is attached to a lock through which you pull the strap in order to shorten and tighten it. Sometimes at the part of the belt where the lock is attached there is a loop through which you can attach a carabineer. You can get tension belts for fairly little money however I do not recommend getting the cheapest ones. Most of the time with cheap ones the end of the nylon strap is not welded so it starts to fray. Also more expensive ones are certified for a specific weight. When fettering a sub or using for suspension bondage I would not recommend for going anything lower than 200kg certified. While you can use tension belts on bare skin I would not recommend it. The edges of the nylon straps are sharp and the strap itself can create rope burn if the sub moves too quickly too long under them.

Bungee Cords

Another cargo securing device that can be used for bondage. They are made out of two hooks connected by a flexible cord covered in nylon fabric. Because they were designed not to secure heavy cargo you will need several bungee cords to achieve the same sense of bondage as you would with a single tension belt. However in this property lies the beauty of bungee cords. Even one single cord with produce down force that can be easily overpowered. But if you attached several ones the sub can struggle against the in his mind weak cords, maybe lift himself a bit but will ultimately fail. Theoretically you can use bungee cords for suspension bondage but I would not advise it. It is too hard to figure out how many you need in order to securely hang someone from the ceiling. Another thing to keep in mind is that the flexible cord over time will stretch and age so you have to check and replace the cords on a regular basis.

A Pair of Police Velcro Restraints

A Pair of Police Velcro Restraints

Velcro Straps

When I talk about Velcro straps I do not mean the cable binders you can buy for next to nothing at the office store but industrial grade Velcro straps that are at least 3cm wide; narrower ones cut too easily into the body. Velcro is again a great mindfuck material: It is regarded as easily to open but once you attach a long enough part of the hard side to the soft side it is impossible for a bound person to break free. You can quickly and easy secure a person quite well with Velcro straps especially when you use Velcro restraints made for the authorities. They come with a loop which makes tightening the straps easy. Doing so will require some practice because the two sides of the straps will quickly attach to each other leaving you with a twine you need to untangle first before.

Please only put the soft side onto the body (if you don’t want that extra sensation agonizing) because the hard side can create painful abrasions. Even the wider ones I would not advise to use for suspension.

The Mr S Hobble Belt

The Mr S Hobble Belt

Belts

The probably most widely available secure mean of bondage in the household. It can be made out of a variety of materials so in order to test if it is made for bondage check if the edges are hard and can harm the skin. Than close the belt, hang it onto a secure anchor point and hand yourself onto it. It is doesn’t break and the claps doesn’t deform, you can use it for bondage. Otherwise you need a new belt. There are belts out there which holes all around the belt which is handy. Other belts come with added bondage features like this one from Mister B that turns into four restraints, this one from Mr S with four D-rings or their Hobble Belt which is a restraint.

Chains

Chains come in a number of varieties. The only ones I would recommend for bondage are twisted link and rolo, either in torus or in circle, patterns. Both patterns are smooth enough to be used on bare skin and offer enough space in the links to attach rope, carabineers or additional chains. Today most chains are welded instead of forged so there is a weldseam on every link. Sometimes these seams can be have sharp edges so before you use chain on bare skin check the links for such spots.

A Runner Holding a Chain in Place

A Runner Holding a Chain in Place

Runner

Originally made for climbing these are nylon straps which are very securely sowed at the ends to create a loop. You can’t adjust the length of them. I mostly use them to create anchor points using a cow hitch. They are also good for suspension bondage if you want a similar length at all attachments points.

Shoe Laces

Another item that can be found in any household but I would only recommend softer and wider shoe laces like fat laces for bondage. Any other can cut circulation and are thus dangerous. Also: Most shoe laces are not designed to withstand too much force so I would not recommend using them for any bondage where much resistance is anticipated but they are great for genital bondage.

Tape & Saran Wrap

When you watch movies tape seems to be the bondage material of choice for thugs these days. And to a certain extend you can use tape for bondage however I would not advise it. First of all getting the tape of when there is body hair under it can be quite painful. It also takes some practice to wrap it right: Too tight and it will cut circulation, too loose and you can easily get out. Also, most glues used on tape, like the iconic duct tape, is water-soluble. So it the sub sweats too much or if you attempt to do a tape gag which is often seen in movies you are at a loss.

These problems do not occur with saran wrap. However you need several layers to make it strong enough to withstand some struggle. If you want to use these means for bondage I would recommend doing a saran wrap base layer and add tape to that. When choosing the saran wrap be careful what you buy. There is wrap that shrinks which requires special surveillance of the sub when you use it, especially for mummification!

In the next part of this series called “Connection Hardware” I will talk about the nifty little things which connect different bondage means without knots.

Bondage Hardware Special Part 1 – Rope

Welcome to the first part of the Bondage Hardware Special. You can find an overview of the different texts of this six part series here.

For many people rope is the first kinky toy they make contact with because it is widely available, inexpensive and with a little practice enables you to do quite secure and creative bondage scene. However with so many different varieties on the market I am starting out this special on bondage hardware with rope.

First a disclaimer: I am not good with ropes. I don’t have the patience (and frankly the hand-eye-coordination) to learn enough skills that I would find sufficient for a scene. Because of that I invested so much money into leather restraints. In order to get you the high quality of information you are used from my website I did extensive research and talked to experts. Also I want to clarify that I neither see any superiority in rope or leather restraints. A few decades ago people who used rope were looked down on because they could not afford leather restraints; today it sometimes feel a bit that people look down on other who “have to” use leather restraints because they cannot handle ropes. Both are valid methods of bondage which have a place in our diverse scene!

Materials

There number of different materials rope is made out of is nearly infinite. So this section raises no claim to completeness. I will cover the most common materials; if you have a question about a material I have not talked about just send me an e-mail.

Materials not usable for bondage

First I want to talk about materials that are not made for bondage. Especially after Fifty Shades of Grey a friend who works at the ER told me about a lot of injuries the resulted from using this materials. Most of them can be found in every house hold so when you are horny and nothing to fetter is around it is good to keep this list in mind to stay away from them:

  • Any kind of yarn
  • Clotheslines
  • String
  • Fishing or kite Lines
Twisted Monk Rope by Mr S

Twisted Monk Rope by Mr S

Material usable for bondage

These materials can theoretically be used for bondage and can be sorted into two groups: Natural and synthetic materials. The most common used natural material is cotton. It is soft, inexpensive and easy to care for. However through the smooth surface knots can travel and if you take one without a solid core knots can tighten. This problem doesn’t occur with hemp rope. Its rougher surface keeps knots in place and them from tightening. Hemp rope is more expensive, a little bit stiffer, when wet nearly impossible to untie and a bit complicated to care for. Natural hemp rope is too hard and too rough for play. In order to make it ready for bondage you have to boil it. After doing so it needs to dry under tension otherwise it will shrink. Once dried you need to oil it. You can get pre-treated hemp rope from Twisted Monk which Mr S just started stoking. It is one the more expensive side yet definitely worth the money. Besides hemp and cotton more or less common materials for rope are sisal, silk, bamboo, coconut husks, burlap and linen. I have seen all of them used for human bondage though they all have their different weaknesses and strength and are hard to come by in a quality that would allow to fetter a person without danger. So if you want a natural material, stick to cotton and hemp.

Besides natural materials they are countless polymers spun into rope. It is impossible to cover all so here are two variants I could advice using: floating rope used in sailing and soft nylon rope. The advantage of synthetic material is that it mostly comes certified for a certain breaking load so you can easily asses if it fits your profile. To check if it should be used for bondage please take a look at all the properties listed in next paragraph. An advantage of synthetic rope is that when you shorten it you can easily weld the ends so it doesn’t fray. Natural rope has to either be sowed properly, whipped (thin yarn spun around the end of the rope) or put a polymer shell like shrinking tubing over the end and weld it.

Mister B Cotton Rope

Mister B Cotton Rope

Rope properties

The property of rope is defined by six major factors which determined whether a rope should be used for bondage or not. I strongly advise to either inspect the rope in store before you purchase it or order a sample to check if you like the rope. As always it is wasted money to buy rope you do not really like because good cared for rope will last you a lifetime!

  1. Construction
    There are two common ways to make rope. First there is plaited rope that comes in three varieties. One of them is squareline which produces a roughly rectangular rope. It is mostly used for haswers and thus through the thickness and weight not made for bondage. I have seen thinner versions which could theoretically be used for bounding someone. However its knot properties are bad so I would not recommend using it. The next one is hollow braiding. This kind of rope is made out of weight bearing threads and hollow inside. This makes it ideal for splicing which is opening up the rope. A disadvantage of it is that knots can travel or even tighten so I would not recommend it. The last variety is core-mantel-braiding. A strong, weight bearing core is surrounded by a woven mantel that protects it from abrasion and environmental influences. The cores come in soft and hard varieties. Only the soft one is made for bondage (see: 3. Flexibility). Depending on the mantel material knots can travel with core-mantel-braided rope.
    The second common was is the one most hemp and cotton rope is made: It is twisted rope. It is made by spinning threats of alternating rotational direction under tension. I prefer this style of rope because knots neither travel not tighten with it. However it cannot be spliced.
  2. Surface
    A common problem of using “wrong” rope is so called “rope burn”. It is irritation of the skin when rough rope travels over it to quickly so through the friction it gets hot; hot enough to create real burns! In order to prevent rope burns the surface of rope should be smooth and soft. Sometimes especially with syntactical rope the surface might appear smooth but the gaps between the individual threats are large enough to create rope burn. So before purchasing grab a piece of rope and quickly pull it over the palm of your hand. If it gets uncomfortable or too warm, this rope is not made for bondage!
  3. Flexibility
    In order to wrap rope tightly around a body and place knots where you want or need them rope has to be flexible enough. It can easily be tested by tying a simple figure-of-eight knot. If you can’t tighten it without much force, the rope is too stiff for bondage. A good rule of thumb is that the thicker the rope or the tighter it is made the less flexible it gets.
  4. Thickness
    Bondage rope comes in four major thicknesses, all for different purposes.
    4mm: Best for tie off body areas, p.e. genital or breast bondage. Not really made for body bondage.
    6mm & 8mm: Made for all bondage purposes. It is kind of a dogmatic question whether you think 6mm or 8mm is ideal for bondage.
    10mm: Also made for all bondage purposes but a bit too thick for “practical” bondage in the playroom. It has more presence on the body so it is best used for pictures.
    Any thickness below 6mm will dramatically increase the likelihood of tying off limbs so only use it for controlled scenarios like genital bondage. Anything below 4mm I consider too dangerous to be used on human beings. If you go above 10mm thickness most rope becomes too stiff. While it is not dangerous to use it is in my opinion a too much pain in the ass to be used for scenes.
  5. Breaking load
    In a nutshell Breaking load measures the loads under which a certain material will break (I will talk more about breaking load part three of this series). If you stick to rope thicker than 6mm you will have no problem with breaking load regardless of the material as long as you are not using a single rope for suspension.
  6. Maintaining
    As every toy most kinds of rope need to be cared for in order to bring you long lasting joy. After having been exposed to body fluids I recommend washing your rope using a fine detergent, low temperature and storing the rope in a pillow case. While you can hang cotton and synthetic rope just onto a cloth line and let it dry, most other natural fibers need care (p.e. hemd rope need to dry under tension, pulled through a carabiner once dried in order to soften and finally being oiled) before they can be stored away.
Mister B Split Rope

Mister B Split Rope

Beyond these properties there are also ropes with added features out there which might make your bondage experience easier. Mister B offeres pre-spliced cotton rope for easier bondage. In sail stores you can find rope with metal reinforced eyelets or with shackles attached to the end.

Rope Lenght

This chapter is again a dogmatic one: Which rope length do you need to bondage? Depending on what kind of bondage you want to create different lengths are good for you. I would generally not recommend buying ropes longer than 10m because they are too difficult to handle. Better learn a simple knot to connect ropes and thus connect different tied body areas instead of trying to handle one long one. With this you can of cause incorporate different colors into your growing web. I did a little survey under my rope dedicated friends and the consensus is that this is a good set to start out with: 2x 10m, 2x 5m, 2x 3m. Because your rope collection will grow as you get more experienced and do more elaborate bondage I recommend purchasing rope from a source where you are certain that you will get the same rope even after a few years so you can maintain a set. This is the case with most sail stores, roperies and special bondage rope vendors like Twisted Monk.

Rope Storage

Theoretically you can just throw dry ropes into a container for storage. However I would not recommend it. First it is disrespectful towards the toys and second – for most people probably the more important reason – it can tangle up there. While you can just coil rope for storage I recommend daisy chaining it (here is the Wikipedia article and a YouTube tutorial how to do it). Daisy chained rope does not only look stylish but it also takes up less space, can be transported in a bag without tangling and you can instantly find the middle of the rope which is handy for some bondage purposes. It takes some practice to learn daisy chaining but once you got it you can quickly and easily store make your rope storable.

Stephan Niederwieser's "Tie Me Up"

Stephan Niederwieser’s „Tie Me Up“

Learning the Ropes

Rope bondage is not hard to learn. You don’t need to know many complicated knots; two or three easy ones are enough for most situations. There are a lot of videos on YouTube that will teach you all kinds of rope bondage from simple to elaborate. However the quality of the video content varies from outstanding good to outstanding dangerous. Also, I am not a big fan of videos because it continues running and is already two steps ahead while you still try the first knot. But if you want trusted video tutorials visit Midori’s Vimeo page.

I personally would recommend books to start out with. If you are German spoken I highly recommend “Bondage – Der Gefesselte Mann” from Tom Schmitt. It is the classic, a little dryly written but no non-sense. If you like it a bit more pornographic get “Tie Me Up!” from Stephan Niederwieser. Both are explicitly for gay men. Mr S and Twisted Monk carry a few books and even DVDs on bondage which seems to be targeted at men and women. And of cause there are Midori’s books on Japanese bondage.

Since rope bondage is the entry into the kink world, in most metropolitan centers you can find courses. In Germany I can recommend the rope bondage workshops of the MLC in Munich and Quälgeist in Berlin. If you are in the USA and really want to get into rope bondage visit one of Midori’s Rope Dojos which take place twice a year.

 

In the next part of this series “Rope Substitutes” I will talk about the means to tie somebody down without rope.

Bondage Hardware Special

Welcome to 2016! As already announced in the Season’s Greeting post I will start this year of with a special on Bondage Hardware. The series with have six parts.

  1. Rope: All you need to know when purchasing rope in a nutshell.
  2. Rope Substitutes: Not good with ropes yet want to create elaborate forms of bondage? This part is all the things you can use for bondage which are not rope.
  3. Connection Hardware: The hardware you need when you want to connect bondage hardware without knots.
  4. Accessories: All the items you need to be prepared for an extensive bondage scene – but the security items.
  5. Safety Hardware: The things you should keep in reach when doing bondage.
  6. Emergency Kit: The things you should keep in reach when something went wrong.

I hope you find this special informative and as much fun to read as I had researching and writing it. If you have any comments and suggestions e-mail or tweet me.