Merry what-ever-you-are-celebrating sexual deviants! As every year, the most important thing first: If you are struggling or need mental support over the holidays, you can find an overview of international help hotlines here.
This year I wanted to open with „What a year it has been…“ and then was painfully reminded that this was last year’s opening. But still, what a year it has been, right?! Political, social and scientific certainties and achievements have been thrown out of the window or got tossed under the bus of opportunism quicker than one could look. While last year I felt the need to point out specific marginalized groups, I actually do not know where to begin and where to end naming outgroups that deserve our focus and special protection. When I started thinking about what to write this year, I was briefly inclined to add „while our community is under attack and needs protection“. But civil rights and protection of members of other communities is not a zero sum game! Every illegally deported person, every trans* person being forced to detransition, every person being denied a fair trial puts every person who is not whatever reason or trait not aligned with the current zeitgeist in potentially harm’s way. So every fight, every resistance against inequality and injustice is a fight for us, for our loved ones, for our community. And while it is easy to despair, keep on fighting! There is hope and so much to live and love for.
Last year, I had hoped to write a little bit more lighthearted Christmas message on December 24th 2025 and well… that went great. For the state of ToyTorture.com I initially had the intention of writing about the destructive impact of AI but I leave that for next year. Don’t want to get to somber and gruesome on Christmas Eve. Just a word of warning, if I suddenly start posting, it’s because AI killed the blogging star. You see, the fun of facing dystopian challenges will probably not stop next year.
But there is good new. ToyTorture.com is fully back and the is a community growing on Bluesky. Except some DMs and promoting switching, I have not used Twitter in the past 12 months. Considering the licenses for AI training they asking their outside-EU-users now, it is probably good to delete everything on their rather sooner than later if you are not inside the EU. And while apparently we have certainly left the Golden Age of Toy Design (why is the USA not doing anything about that?!), there are still enough interesting and fun toys to review. My goal is it to make it to the 15 years anniversary in 2027. Let’s check in together in one year to see how far I have made it.
While we are on the subject, a quick grim warning: If you ever wanted a toy from a small maker, buy it NOW. Don’t postpone, don’t spend the money on another luxury scented candle or overpriced beauty product, buy the toy NOW! The current economic situation which de-prioritizes kink purchases in addition to the pricing power from Chinese knock-off manufacturer, puts pressure on every kink maker who does not have branding and quality power to demand living prices and has enough turnover to pay their bills. It has started with silicone toy makers who started their craft during COVID but never gained the traction and thus scale effects it needs to be successful. But it is now swapping over to established yet niche business like Parus in Munich, famous for their heavy stainless steel restraints. In the next months we will sadly see more and more of that.
After the hacker attack almost two years ago, I am glad that I did find my step back in writing reviews. Of course, they are fewer reviews than when I have started. This spring I have gotten a couple of encouraging messages to return to one review per week as a standard. Until I become a kinkster of independent means, this is not going to happen. 13 years ago I was an undergraduate, now I am a mildly (?) successful professional who has a way more active social life. Priorities shift and life moves on. Since I hate standing still, that is a good thing! What is not a good thing: A year ago I promised an E-Stim Special which did not happen! There were only two e-stim toy reviews in 2025. Mea culpa! I put it high on my to-do-list – which is written in shifting sand. So stay tuned, stay curious, stay excited for what is to come in 2026.
One thing I am putting out there after my experience or rather many post event messages in 2025: Don’t be afraid of me! I am not a star, a celebrity or anything. I am an clumsy introvert (which makes appear way more aloof than I am) and probably more afraid of your than you are of me. If you see me, talk to me! Since I am face blind, I don’t expect me to recognize you. But on most instances – don’t come talking to me when I am playing, like it has happened during Easter in Quälgeist – I love talking to you and getting your feedback, thoughts and ideas for my website. If you want to top/ dom me, even better. I am a lighter, more sensual player than most think. So no performance anxiety! We will probably find some mutually enjoyable common ground. If you want to sub for me, feel free to ask! Since my topping dance card it pretty full, so don’t be disappointed if nothing beyond a friendly chat will happen. But I never blame a slave/ gimp/ sub/ dog/ pig/ bottom for trying.
While last year, I closed the message with a poem from Tennyson. This year, let me finish with something more contemporary. While written for Jim Morrison of the Doors and referring to playing music, this quote is my muse when I need to be remind of all the joy there is in the world, the wonders never ceasing to amaze and inspire me, the fun in kink, the campy absurdity of the stuff that we are doing and the laughter and horniness it brings to us.
Hail thee who play
Michael McClure, Oh Muse
On that note: Happy Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, Christmas, pigmas, Lucia or whatever you are celebrating. Take care of yourself, have some quality time with yourself, your family, friends and chosen family, eat well and enjoy the gifts life is giving you, sometimes in strange way.
