Beastli, Slinky, Ramsta & Conka

Vendor: John Thomas Toys

John Thomas Toys is a good example how you, as my readers, influence what I review on this platform. Over the past few years, a larger number of silicone (fantasy) anal toy brands have been founded. Way more than I can keep track off. And sometimes, even a big brand slips below my radar (after all, ToyTorture.com is a hobby, not a 9to5 for me). So when over the course of the past few months I have been getting more and more messages about John Thomas Toys, I decided to include this brand as a first in this anal toy special.

The John Thomas Toys Beastli, Slinky, Ramsta and Conka

Construction

Like I have already written in the intro, John Thomas Toys only manufactures toys out of platinum silicone. In the past years, this material has become the material of choice for me and made me to replace ALL my vinyl toys for silicone ones. Platinum silicone is 100% body safe and hypoallergenic. The surface is super-smooth making it hard for bacteria to linger and the toys easy to clean: Soak them in warm dish-soap water, if necessary use a soft brush to get lube residues off, dry, sanitize and store away. What some consider a draw-back is that you must not use silicone lube with platinum silicone because the silicone oil in it will dissolve the silicone. As an avid anal player who only uses water-based resp. powder-based lubes like vetgel or XLube and very rarely Crisco, this limitation does not really affect me and to be frank all my other play partners. In order not to expose the toys to plasticizers that could harm them, stores them in a well ventilated place without touching other toys, especially rubber or vinyl/ PVC toys. There have been (anecdotal) cases of different silicone toys effecting each other but the reactivity at room temperature of properly processed platinum silicone is very low so it is highly unlikely.

Detail of Beastli’s Textured Glans

So much what is true for all platinum silicon manufacturer. While most companies in this industries offer almost a plethora of customization possibilities, John Thomas Toys takes a different route: They design the toys in the UK and manufacture them in the USA. This means, unlike other companies where you have to wait for weeks and months, their stock is ready to be dispatched immediately.  Drawback is, what you see on their website is what you get. Colorwise this means all toys come in black and usually in one or two other colors/ pattern. You can choose between soft and medium firmness, which – to be frank at Shore A15 and A20 is more a medium and firm. All toys come with a vac-u-lock home which makes them easier to navigate when playing with a partner (simply stick one finger in it) or enables a wide range of nifty accessories like handles, suction cups or fuck machines when you play on your own.

Detail of Slinky’s Softly Flowing Texture

Beastli, Slinky, Ramsta & Conka

Generally speaking, John Thomas Toys makes toys for texture aficionados. Almost all of their toys are covered in grooves, ridges, bumps and drops which make for an intense stimulation of the anus and the prostate. Naturally these toys are not for compete novices because the texture makes these toys harder to take than like-sized smooth counterparts. So either pre-stretch properly or choose a size smaller than you would usually do. However, some of the toys are tamer than they might look at first glance.

Detail of Beastli’s Curveted Rigdes

Beastli is the most intense of the four toys in this review. Starting out with a dullish glans textured with two rings of bumps and a considerable glans rim drop, it starts out with a bang for the anus and the prostate. The shaft’s basic shape is a steeply tapering, slightly convex cone. But this shape is actually hard to spot because the shaft is heavily textured. Five curveted, steep and thick ridges divide the body in six segments. Between these segments the surface is not smooth but covered in small grooves and bumps; it almost looks like elephant skin. At the back of the shaft runs a thick ventral groove from just below the glans all the way to the bottom. All of this texture makes the Beastil the perfect toy for riding on your own. While the diameter gradually increases, your ass opens up over time more and more to take the next ridge until you hit the base. Since none of the texture runs perfectly perpendicular, the Beastli is also a good toy for getting fucked by a partner. Twisting the dildo inside the hole unleashes a completely new set of sensations because feeling the curvature of the ridges move inside the hole is a unique sensation neither my testees nor I have felt before.

Detail of Slinky’s Tip and Texture

Compare Beastli, the Slinky is a surprising soft and gentle toy. It has actually become my top recommended toy for bottoms starting out with texture play. At the top there is a long and smooth cone-shaped glans that softly opens up the sphincter. The maximum diameter of this toy is only about 5% larger than the glans diameter. So if you can take the glans, you can take the rest of the toy. The shaft is texture with smoothly rising and relatively steeply dropping ridges. These ridges go all around the shaft. There is not ventral groove or other lateral texture. This means then a top twists the toy in order to encourage the anus to open up more, no texture will irritate this delicate body area causing it to tense up. The sensation of having Slinky more or less rapidly enter and leave the anus is more of a gentle message. So it looks tougher than it is actually is.

Detail of Ramsta’s Tip and Texture

This also accounts for the last two toys in this review. Despite being very different in basic shape – Ramsta beiong a dildo and Conka a plug – they share the same properties. Ramsta starts out with a perfectly cone-shaped, slightly elongated tip. From there on the shaft slightly increases in diameter till the base. Just below the tip a ring of six half-dome bumps with a diameter of 18.5mm and a height of 14mm goes around the shaft (all size for my size large). There are seven of these rings which are staggered so in the gap between two bumps there is a bump in the ring below. The gaps are filled with two 10mm x7mm bumps above each other. Since the diameter increases further down the shaft, the gaps between the bumps increase. To be honest, taking the first ring of bumps is a challenge. The individual bumps are quite steeps and the relatively large gaps between them are not really encouraging the sphincter to open up. So a good pre-stretch is necessary! But once inside, the bumps are so close together that they more feel like a bumpy surface than individual peaks. Yes, the sensation of having Ramsta vigorously drilled into your ass and quickly twisted is intense. But not nearly as intense as you might guessed/ feared from looking at the dildo. The sensation becomes more intense the further you go down the shaft because the gap between the bumps increases.

Conka’s Vac-U-Lock Hole as an Example for the Feature on all John Thomas Toys

With the Conka is about the same game. It looks intense but then actually surprised how gentle it was. The almost perfectly cone-shaped body is covered in staggered rows of four cone-shaped bumps. While at the tip there are two rows of small ones, over the following six rows the diameter only slightly increases so there are no gaps. The gaps between four last big bumps is filled with two small bumps. When I looked at the toy, I guessed it would be heavy to take. But the bumps are so evenly distributed without gaps, they feel and behave like a textured surface with. The sensation intensity between Conka and Ramsta is about the same as between Slinky and Beastli. The Conka gives a nice, intense massage when fucking or twisting inside the hole.

Conka with his Even Texture

Where to buy?

John Thomas Toys only sells their toys directly through their website. The models cost between £39.95 and £229.95 depending on the shape and size. When you want to purchase one of the models, I highly recommend searching for them on John Thomas Toys’ website to see if they have an exciting color for this particular toy in stock. Mine are all black but for the bunch I am going to get, I will most definitely be more adventurous colorwise.